Joke

Living next door to a barely verbal, beyond-screeching-painkiller addict in a specialist pneumonia ward is a unique experience. Being admitted to hospital again, a few weeks later, but this time being out of it in intensive care, then thinking I was having a spiritual journey in a high dependency ward, is slightly ludicrous. The cosmic joke is alive and kicking.. The last time I was in hospital was with an ectopic pregnancy thirty years ago. Even though I’m not interested in being ill, I wonder if I’m being forced to be. Or maybe I underestimate how the dharma classes have taught me to be a witness and know I’m separate from my experiences. Indifference helps steadiness, and so does not emotionally collapsing. I’m a natural worrier about the future, but the things I can’t do much about, I’m oddly untouched by, and surrender and pragmatism prevail.