Take

There’s a way of playing with consent once you’ve got the basics of who it’s for and how to feel. Brief moments of connection and touch, an increasing bravery to requests, and appreciation of gifts taken and offered. A chance to notice sensation, longing and satisfaction. Small pleasures. “May I touch your hair.  May I hold you round the waist? May I place my hand over your cock?” Doing it for you. To know how something feels and the effect it has on you. Can you feel the effects on your skin and in your body, breath, and mood? Close your eyes to notice the effect of the touch on you rather than trying to affect another, to get somewhere or turn them on. Let direct pleasure affect you. Do you like what you’ve chosen, or do you need to adjust? Be part of the experience rather than spectatoring on someone else's for crumbs of satisfaction or affirmation. Your ego loves indirect pleasure. It's totally affirming and conditioned. Nothing wrong with that, yet it's not the whole story by any means. Being in and of the experience takes trust in oneself, an undoing of what you've always done, and being willing to shift focus, recognising and valuing your own embodiment.